We have a shelf built into the wall next to the toilet. During my usual two hour sit over the commode this morning, I took inventory of its contents: a jar of coconut oil, a jar of cannabis salve, a tube of lidocaine, a tube of cortisone cream, a half empty jar of 100 Fleet glycerine suppositories (expired August of 16), a tub of Tucks wipes, a box of 12 belladonna / opium suppositories, two magic bullet suppositories, one Enemeez Plus mini-enema, a box of 4 Fleet mini-enemas, a half empty box of silver nitrile gloves (size M), a Kindle, a lighter, and a pipe full of cannabis. It occurs to me as I scan each of these familiar morning accompaniments that I will (one way or another) have no need of any them after next Thursday (except perhaps for the gloves, the weed, and the Kindle).
Next Thursday’s the day the surgeon will remove what’s left of the ovarian tumors while another surgeon performs a colostomy. I can’t help but think how life changing this is going to be, hopefully in a positive way. In a very weird sense I actually feel quite excited about the benefits of colostomy, despite my worries about recovery, etc., etc.
Do any of you have any advice to share about either the procedure or your experiences with a colostomy? I’m told I can slowly introduce foods and can basically eat anything in time. True? Any pointers you have would be most helpful.
Hi had a colostomy last October, I was only in hospital for 5 days, the first few weeks i had a few small leaks but with help of stoma nurse tried different things and found a colostomy bag that worked for me, I was told i could eat what i wanted and have had no problems, made a huge change to my life no more worries about bowel accidents, can change bag anywere and only takes couple of minutes to change,any question you have i will answer best i can
Jaylock, take a good look at your bowel regime equipment. You might want to photograph it for posterity sake, or to bring back old memories of the s**t you used to go through when evacuating your bowels. As you take this photograph, you might want to utter a few complimentary words to the suppositories and all the other paraphernalia listed above, saying: "Thank you for helping me through the necessary evil that I've be subject to all these years, but I will not need you anymore." Then, on the day you are due in hospital, remove it all from the shelf. Your life and your bowel regime will be so much easier when you return. Five minutes, five minutes of cleaning, positioning a clean or new stoma pouch, and that's it. Such bliss! It is important to get the right bag for you. My stoma has an area around it that dips slightly. I put a soft skin-cohesive ring around the stoma called a 'slim', which fits snugly, seals the bag and prevents leakage. I also use a bag with a slight convexity. Your stoma nurse will advise you. Don't worry. Just think of the nightmare you are leaving behind.
I had seen pictures of stomas before my colostomy operation but I wasn’t prepared for the first sightings of the shockingly pink colour of my bowel as it jutted blasphemously beyond the surface of my white abdomen — a terrifying glimpse into the inner workings of my body. Utterly disconcerting. The stoma, as it is called, the small mouth-like opening to the left of my navel, is approximately twenty-three millimetres in diameter and protrudes from the surrounding skin by a millimetre or so. It’s insanely wrinkled but the folds of flesh are smooth and rounded, just as you’d imagine a cross-section of intestine would look.
The stoma seems to have a life force of its own: a slow, rhythmic peristaltic movement that gently pushes its contents along. When the bowel is full, it opens up like a flower and, with a squelching fizzle, expels its offending load — a six to eight centimetre long stool as thick as a man’s finger. This can happen several times in succession, and since there are no sphincter muscles to physically hold anything back, the movement is uncontainable: an involuntary reflex action that one has no control over. When the fetid load has been discharged, the stoma becomes motionless (pun unintentional). The creases and folds come together and the little pink hole closes up.
A disconcerting feature of this little pink crater, this fairy ring of offal, is the way it spontaneously ejects gases. It’s unimaginably badly behaved, always blowing its trumpet exactly when you don’t want it to. It’s an errant, mischief-maker, and its loud to boot. A deep tuber-like rumble guaranteed to hit a flatulent note exactly when you don’t want it to: in the middle of an important meeting, or perhaps when you are out with friends and enjoying a meal in a restaurant. I have learned to make fun of it.
The pouch into which the stool collects, has a self sticking flange which adheres firmly to the skin. It also has a clear plastic window. This handy feature serves two purposes: it helps when positioning the pouch (the hole that fits around the stoma is machine-cut exactly to size), and it gives one an insight into how the stoma is working (through this little aperture one can observe the stools oozing out). It also has a rather ingenious charcoal filter which allows gases to escape unnoticed. One disadvantage, of course, is that the filter can become clogged. Then pouch will blow up like a balloon, the excess gases having no means of escape (unless you wear a two-piece bag or one that is openable). My bag is openable. One merely unravels the end and smooths the air out of the opening. It’s called: “burping the bag”. The charcoal filters are usually very efficient at sterilising unpleasant odours.
To remove the pouch, one lifts the edge of the flange and squirts glue remover beneath it. Repeat this process until the flange comes away from the skin. The used pouch is then placed in a small polythene bag which is tied and disposed of. Having exposed the stoma, the area is scrupulously cleaned with soap and water. A thin film of barrier cream is applied to the skin. This takes less than a minute to dry. Only then can the new pouch be pressed into position, the self adhesive flange smoothed down and around so that it is firmly stuck. Hey presto! Job done.
Occasionally, and quite unexpectedly, the stoma erupts as it is being cleaned. A small parabolic hollow forms in the surrounding flesh, which then suddenly flowers out and up as it discourages its putrid load. As the stool makes its squidgy exit, a quick calculation of its trajectory is necessary to avert a disaster. With a deft movement a cleansing wipe is strategically positioned to gather the squidgy eel, the grotesque remnants of previous meals rising like a Phoenix and threatening to defile its surroundings as it collapses under its own weight.
A fun way to determine how fast one’s peristalsis works, is to swallow sweetcorn whole. If you make a mental note of the day it was ingested, you can compare it to the moment it appears in your stools. Its rather amusing to see the yellow corn emerging from your body, the smooth kernels glistening within the stool as it is rudely ejected. For the record, mine takes approximately two or three days depending on how much fruit I’ve had. For example if I eat a kiwi in the morning, and three or four prunes in the afternoon, I can shunt the whole load through in forty-eight hours. Not bad for somebody with a spinal injury and a rather flaccid bowel.
How I love my stoma. If I could, I would give it a tender kiss — after a thorough clean, of course. Hey, maybe there’s an opening on you tube? I could become a millionaire, with many viewers fascinated by my little pink mound. I guess somebody, somewhere would find it sexually attractive. Perhaps if I licentiously slipped a sausage in and out? Yes, there’s potential there. I can see the money ticking up.
How I love my stoma. If I could, I would give it a tender kiss — after a thorough clean, of course. Hey, maybe there’s an opening on you tube? I could become a millionaire, with many viewers fascinated by my little pink mound. I guess somebody, somewhere would find it sexually attractive. Perhaps if I licentiously slipped a sausage in and out? Yes, there’s potential there. I can see the money ticking up.
Post by softballdad on Jul 2, 2018 12:49:03 GMT -8
MIKEQ that was quite a story. All are reasons I've decided to stick with the bullets. In my world I need to be able to control when I drop ass. I can't have fart sounds emminating out of my midriff when meeting with customers and colleagues. I also feel I would miss my farts. They make me laugh even when I'm in a s***ty mood (pun intended lol). As a quad I've learned to "sense" what that pressure is coming from some deep in my gut. To stiffle the sound I sit up straight and keep the pressure on my butt. After the coast is clear I can lean forward and let er rip. Ocassionally I'm disappointed with just a little squeak but some days after some chicken and potatoes I pass gas so hard I swear I am levitating over my chair. The relief of passing that pass is extremely satisfying. It's the wet ones I can do with out. AKA "sharts" those little ers come out of nowhere and ruin your day. It was after a string of these that I joined and ostomy group on FB and consulted with a colorectal surgeon but the horror stories seemed worse for a majority of them plus I can't apply the bags myself. If you have your finger dexterity then you can change it when you need to. I didn't want to "burp" my bag while out to dinner with a lady. i'll just keep cropdusting people strategically and blaming it on someone nearby. All the best.
You guys are hilarious. I had a great laugh reading through these this morning. Thanks for the encouragement, too. I did wonder about escaping gas and leaks. It sounds as though you've discovered ways to manage them, though (as we always seem to do).
softballdad, I know what you mean about the wonderful enjoyment of farts. Unfortunately, I literally haven't farted in about two years and have been so horribly bloated and miserable. The number of doctors I've told, 'I don't fart anymore' who've just sorta gone, 'Hmmmmm.' Apparently it's a huge symptom of ovarian cancer that no-one seemed aware of. Since chemo my bloating has almost completely subsided, but still no farts. Shame. But it doesn't seem worth skipping the colostomy just to see if they come back . If they don't, at least I'll be able to avoid the uncontrollable situations mikeq, and trikerv8, mention.
I'm stating my bowel prep at midnight tonight. Fun, fun, fun. Thanks for the feedback and kind words everyone.
DoTerra has essential oils that are great for intestinal problems. I’ve used several of their products. lavender got them for me. “Bloating and gas can make your stomach feel tight and full, often leaving you feeling sluggish and unappealing. If you’re experiencing these difficulties, use DigestZen oil.* DigestZen will help reduce bloating and gas so that you can feel your best at any time of the day.* www.doterra.com/US/en/blog/spotlight-digestzen-digestive-blend
Glad you are finding the oils to be helping. I have found such great help from them. I know many people laugh it off. For me it has worked, off gabapentin, baclafen, methocarbamal and down from 70 vicodin a month to about 20 been the only thing to work on my neck from a prior injury and stenosis in my neck. Was going to get it fused and instead had my fall and have 14 inch rods in my back so turning is limited and would only be worse if I did the neck also.
I put the drops of essential oil in an empty capsule, close it, and swallow it with water. I put several drops in the capsule. Especially with oregano oil, it is important to take the oil this way, as oregano oil would burn the skin on your mouth very painfully if the oil touches your skin. The oil you take internally MUST be food grade (for internal use), not just the grade used for aroma therapy. These are two very different qualities of oil.
goisgo, Oregano oil kills E-coli! www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23484421 “The antibacterial activity of oregano essential oil (Origanum heracleoticum L.) against clinical strains of Escherichia coli and Pseudomonas aeruginosa].”
Yes, it probably kills some good bacteria, too. But stopping the horrible pain of an E-coli infection without antibiotics, without going to the doctor, and without going to a hospital feels like a miracle. After about an hour, you feel relief. After another hour, you konk out and sleep. Wake up. Take another dose. Sleep late. And get up actually wanting breakfast. I can’t begin to tell you how I suffered as a young woman living in South America, back when I didn’t know about oregano oil.
When I’m in real pain, I take oregano oil, use my zapper (SyncroZap), and take digestive enzymes. “Fifteen capsules (about 5 or 6 grams) of mixed enzyme powders can digest the dead matter coming from four hours of zapping. Eight hours require two such doses. More is better.” www.drclark.net/en-us/products-devices-a-techniques/zapper-basics/zapping
“What makes the carvacrol in oil of oregano particularly interesting as a natural antibiotic is that it is shown to destroy harmful bacteria while keeping helpful probiotic bacteria intact. Research shows that, at dosages which cause 97% to 100% of inhibition of pathogenic bacteria, only 3% to 5% of probiotics were inhibited.” hollywoodhomestead.com/oregano-oil-infections/