Dreams and walking

Yes, nice thread.

After my injury, I was hospitalized for two and a half months. The constant interruptions kept me from sleeping well or ruminating on my new condition. Then, I spent over a year and three months in other facilities,...which also interfered with my sleep and any illusion of hope for the future. But at about the one-year mark from my accident, I dreamed on two separate nights, a very real-seeming dream. It was, I think, the equivalent of what Mikeq was describing in his own case. Here’s mine:

I live in a huge metroplex, with lots of stores, shopping malls, and places to eat every kind of food. There are also amusement parks, like Six Flags over Texas. Though I was a college student at the time of my accident, and didn’t have much money, visiting the mall was free, and seeing all the books, new gadgets, art supplies, and clothes was my pleasure, even when I bought very little. I drove a small car and already had disability license plates due to a bad knee. So, I would circle the mall until a handicap parking spot opened up. Then, I would park -smug that I didn’t have to walk too far to the door- and walk between the parked cars to the mall entrance.

The scenario that I just described was in both of my dreams that I will now tell you about.

[dream scequence] I got out of my car and started walking toward the mall entrance. I was weaving between parked cars. I came face to face with a nice married couple who were headed toward me, returning to their car with their purchases. Suddenly, I remembered that I had been in an accident and that I shouldn’t be able to walk,...but there I was walking. I could hardly believe my happy state of being able to walk. So, I said to the couple, “I’m sorry, but please, could you tell me if I am really walking? Is this real, and am I standing here?” And the couple both kindly assured me that it was all true and real, and that I was really there with them and that I was walking. Well, I can’t tell you what a relief that was! Here were two perfectly sane people telling me that I was just fine. But as I continued walking toward the mall entrance, a sad tell-tale realization came over me. I could believe that I was not paralyzed and was walking, but what about the fact that my left leg had been amputated in the accident and that I wasn’t wearing a prosthetic, nor had I ever been fitted for one? The dream began to disintegrate and crumble. I held onto it longingly for a few more brief moments. But reality prevailed, and I woke up in my nursing home bed. I felt a sadness like having lost a beloved friend. Still, I was glad I’d had the dream.

The other dream was similar, with a few different twists and turns, but I’m all talked out now, and I feel validated just by having had you to to listen to my story.